Month: June 2023

The power of the spoken word

A few weeks ago Red asked me to read to her and talk to her when the time came that she could no longer talk back. That time came late Monday morning as she began transitioning, as one of the hospice nurses said.

Reading to her has been a regular thing since shortly after she left the hospital and moved into the hospice, when she began to regain strength after the ordeal of chemotherapy and other aspects of aggressive anti-lymphoma treatment. You may recall I put out a first installment of the Jeep Thompson saga after I read her the first half of the unfinished novel and she gave it a thumbs up.

From Jeep we went to The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett and a collection of (of course) Ray Bradbury stories. For the last hours she had specifically asked me for my own writing, so Monday night and early Tuesday morning I added A Bridge at Crossroads to the mix. I just hope, when we meet again, she doesn’t tell me, “No! I wanted to hear Myke Phoenix and The Imaginary Bomb, not your prose poems!”

I’ve already mentioned that over the last couple of hours I read from the Gospels and Psalms. Of course, I was steadying my laptop with my right hand and giving her a ponytail with my left. It was my last opportunity. 

Familiarizing myself again with the Sermon on the Mount was enlightening; there’s a lot of meat in there about living in a spirit of love. The Beatitudes are amazing. I left out some of the “if you lust after a woman, gauge out your eyes” stuff, focusing instead on the passages about turning the other cheek and not worrying about everyday troubles, for example. 

It was interesting to me that as she faced her mortality, Red went back to her Catholic Church roots. It was not uncommon to find her watching EWTN when I came to visit. And going through Jesus’ teachings in those final hours, I can see where she might have found some comfort there. I certainly did.

One thing I learned with all of this reading aloud: You hear the words better when you hear the words. I have always adored Bradbury’s turns of phrase, but speaking them gave me even a greater appreciation. I realized, if I may say so myself, that some of my writing sings. And Jesus was a pretty tremendous guy.

I’m starting to think about what to do with the second half of this year that has been, for the first six month, the most horrible of my life. Red has been telling me for a long time to start making audiobooks. It’s long past time I listened to her advice.

Carol Jean “Cj” Townsend

Carol Jean “Cj” Townsend, 71, of rural Luxemburg, passed away after an illness of several months on Tuesday, June 27, 2023, at the Jack and Engrid Meng Hospice Residence, as her husband, Warren, read Matthew 22:34-40 to her. She was born March 9, 1952, in Appleton to Loren and Ruth (Mullenbach) Luedeke of Hilbert. She was “Little Red” to her father’s Big Red, and in later years she was just Red in Warren’s newspaper columns and blogs.

Cj was a devoted mother, grandmother and gardener. In retirement she delighted in her grandsons, digging in the soil, cooking and baking and canning, refinishing furniture, and remaking the living room every few months. She fervently defended the sanctity of life. After one of the longest engagements on record (starting Christmas 1998), Cj married Warren Bluhm in Fish Creek on Jan. 28, 2017.

A graduate of Hilbert High School and the University of Wisconsin-Stevens Point with a degree in chemistry and art, she worked in several labs over a distinguished career, including for Robert E. Lee and Associates and the Green Bay Metropolitan Sewerage District, and most passionately in quality control for Terry Lemerond’s Enzymatic Therapy and its successor incarnations, where she spent the last quarter-century of her professional career.

In addition to her husband, Warren, Cj is survived by her son, Lee (Sarah), and grandsons Luke and Robert, Abrams; Lee’s father, Rick Townsend, Little Suamico; sisters-in-law Carole (Keith Berchem) Luedeke, Hilbert, and Connie Bluhm, Cinnaminson, New Jersey; brother-in-law, Bruce Bluhm, Chester, New Jersey; nephew, Chris (Kelly) Luedeke and their son, Owen, Kaukauna; nieces Elizabeth and Joanna Bluhm, Cinnaminson, New Jersey; and furry children Dejah, Summer and Blackberry.

She was preceded in death by her parents; parents-in-law Richard and Hilda (Elwell) Bluhm; brother, Gary Luedeke; and brother-in-law Charlie Bluhm.

In accordance with her wishes, there will be no formal service. A gathering and celebration of Cj’s life will be held 5:30-7:30 p.m. Friday, July 7, at Pfotenhauer Funeral Home, 1145 Cardinal Lane, Howard, emceed by the Rev. Cory Dahl.

The family sincerely thanks the staff at Unity Hospice, especially Phillip, Ann, Brittany, and Ingrid, for the dedication and compassion that brought joy and peace to Carol Jean’s final weeks.

She made the world more beautiful

Because she had been reconnecting with her faith as lymphoma began to take her life, and because long before the end she had asked me to read to her when the time came, I started reading parts of the Bible to Red around 5:30 a.m. Tuesday. I started with the Nativity story from Luke 2, detoured to Genesis 1, went through much of the Sermon on the Mount, and shared more Psalms than I remember. I made sure to include Proverbs 31 in the mix and was not surprised to realize that I was sitting next to the woman described in that passage.

When she passed away at about 7:20 a.m., I believe the last thing she heard on this mortal coil was Matthew 22:34-40:

And when the Pharisees heard that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, they themselves gathered together. One of them, an expert in the law, tested Him with a question: “Teacher, which commandment is the greatest in the Law?”

Jesus declared, “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

What wonderful words to share anytime, but especially at that particular moment!

People like to blame God for some of the most atrocious behavior humanity can produce, but scratch even slightly below the surface and you discover that the atrocities were committed not by God but by foolish humans who thoroughly misinterpreted the God whose two most important laws begin with the word “Love.” It’s not God’s fault that we can’t read or listen.

At a time like this, you realize how petty are our squabbles with our neighbors. Why waste time doing anything except loving when we have only a finite time on this planet?

I had the privilege of spending nearly 26 years with the most beautiful woman I have ever known, and of course I’m wrecked. But I’m mostly grateful that she entered my life when she did and stayed as long as that. I feel like the most blessed of men to have been part of the life of such a special person.

Red was a Master Gardener, and I came home Tuesday afternoon to find the first echinacea bloom of the season, always my favorite among the perennials she planted. God’s timing is impeccable.