“You know what the most true scene in the history of movies is? In When Harry Met Sally, when Billy Crystal tells Meg Ryan, ‘Men and women can’t be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.’”
“Do you think so?”
“I do.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“All my male friends want to have sex with me?”
“It’s true. I’d take it one step further: Pretty much every conversation between men and women is a negotiation about having sex.”
“Oh, come on.”
“It’s true. At some point in every conversation, the guy thinks about having sex with the woman.”
“Yes, thinks maybe, but you just said he turns the conversation into a negotiation.”
“You would be amazed. You know the old expression about how a guy undresses you with his eyes?”
“Of course.”
“It’s constant. If a guy looks at a woman, he’s checking her out. It’s automatic and unconscious.”
“You’re just trying to creep me out now.”
“It is creepy, I know. I’m just saying. Look, I’m inside a male body. I can’t stop how it thinks.”
“You don’t have to act on it.”
“Of course not. We’re civilized. But there’s always that undercurrent.”
“Well, I’m glad we had this conversation. Now I know you think of women as nothing but sex objects.”
“No, of course not. But if you really want to try to be friends, you have to always be careful because the sex part will always be trying to get in the way, just like the movie says. Heck, Harry and Sally end up in bed and married. It’s the whole point.”
“My mom did always say you should marry your best friend.”
“You should, but at that point you’re not friends anymore, you’re … you know. That’s why you can’t go back to being ‘just friends.’”
“I’m friends with some of my ex-boyfriends.”
“But they’re always thinking, right? Come on.”
“Well, this has been very, um, enlightening. I probably won’t ever see that movie again in the same way.”
“Probably not. So.”
“So?”
“Do you want to?”
“Do I want to what?”
“Seriously?”
